Three for the road (to Malacañan)

2016 is some eight months away, but the race to Malacañan is on.
Three “early birds” have already positioned themselves at the starting block, all too eager to spring out the moment the racing gun explodes.
Manuel Araneta Roxas II (Mar) – former DTI Undersecretary; former interior and local government secretary; former senator (he topped the race in 1998 riding high on a campaign gimmick as Mr. Palengke).
Today, Mar is tagged by detractors as Mr. Palpak for his burgling performance during the typhoon Yolanda relief operation in 2013. He missed being a hero by his arrogant department and turned being a heel.
Strong points: Money. Party machinery.
Weak points: No charisma, no mass appeal, elitist image, perceived incompetence.
Battle Cry: Daan Matuwid
Vision: P-Noy’s vision is his vision.
Jejomar C. Binay, Vice President; former Makati City mayor; former MMDA Chairman; former Corista; former poor boy.
Strong points: Competence; political savvy; vast experience in public service; principled fighter.
Weak points: questionable post as Makati City mayor.
Battle cry: Makati! Makati! Makati!
Vision: Makatisize the Philippines
Grace Poe, junior senator, topnotcher in the 2010 election, with virtually zero experience as a government executive, she aims to be the government’s chief executive. (Could there be something wrong with her mental equilibrium?)
By joining the presidential derby at an early stage of her political life, she fast-tracked her political career and jeopardized her political future.
Without valid and credible credentials, she insults the intelligence of the voters. She must be surrounded by political morons as political advisors.
Strong points: mass appeal, phenomenal popularity,
Weak points: inadequate knowledge of government bureaucracy and Republican system of government, administrative experience.
Battle Cry: Dream. Dream. Dream.
Vision: Relive the dream of FPJ.
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“I’m your next President” – Grace POE.
“I accept the challenge to run for vice president” – Chiz Escudero
OMG! What’s happening to our country?
Something terribly outrageous if not insane, is brewing on our political frontier.
Two overly ambitious political midgets want to run a country of 100 million citizens.
Who do they think they are? Wonder Woman and Captain Barbell?
These two extremely neophyte senators (one is second-termer senator while the other just got elected in 2013) must be thinking too highly of themselves. (Sobrang bilib sa sarili).
Well, some people – no matter how highly educated – simply do not know themselves and their own limitations, especially, mentally. Consequently and witlessly, they insult voters by going after offices they do not deserve to hold.
These days Grace and Chiz are at the highest point or greatest degree of daydreaming. They are riding high in a huge ego-balloon that floats all over fantasyland they call Pilipinas.
Somebody should prick that balloon and bring them back to earth and reality, or they might disappear completely in the horizon.
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A Grace Poe presidency would be a photocopy of the Cory Aquino misrule and Joseph Estrada comical reign when advisers ran rings around them and virtually ran the country. Cory and Erap were reduced to willing puppets.
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Chiz boasted that their party is Partido Pilipinas and the Pilipino people are its members. (Ugh!)
Sen. Serge Osmena was too kind to tag Chiz’s play of words as “gimmick”.
I won’t be that kind. In my book, it is lunatic. And I guess it won’t be wrong if we say Grace and Chiz are loonies for imagining themselves as the two highest officials in the land.
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A Grace-Chiz tandem looks attractive to the young voting populace. Substantially, however, the two are politically too raw and immature, and fragile to carry the nation on their shoulders. The presidential shoes are too big for Grace or Chiz. They should be humble, honest and realistic enough not to try them for size.
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Will the Grace-Chiz tandem capture Malacanan? Most unlikely. It’s virtually “mission impossible” for them.
Under Comelec guidelines, they are categorized as nuisance candidates, because they have no political machinery, or real political party, no political platform, no political philosophy, no clear program of government, no funding to sustain a nationwide campaign, and no vision for the country.
Partido Pilipinas? That could be the biggest joke of the year, thanks to joker Chiz.