“We need criticism to keep us awake.” – Dr. Jose P. Rizal, Filipino hero
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There are criticisms and there are criticisms. There are good criticisms (yes, believe it or not) and there are bad criticisms (which oftentimes are unsavory and unkind).
Now, let me start this thought with a story.
Dante, one of the successful businessmen in the city, was highly critical of his competitors’ storefront windows. “Why, they are the dirtiest windows in town,” he told his wife.
It was not only his wife – but other businessmen as well – who grew tired of his continual criticism and nitpicking comments about his competitors’ windows. “What can I say,” the wife replied.
One day, over coffee, Dante carried the subject just too far. Before leaving, a friend suggested to Dante that he get his own windows washed.
Dante followed the advice, and the next day at coffee, he exclaimed, “I can’t believe it. As soon as I washed my windows, my competitor must have cleaned his too. You should see them shine.”
As Dale Carnegie, American writer and developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, and public speaking, puts it: “Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain – and most fools do.”
To criticize means, according to my dictionary, is “to find fault with” or “to point out the faults of.” But criticizing also means “to consider the merits and demerits of and judge accordingly.”
It’s never fun to be on the receiving end of criticism. Sydney Harris reminded, “What people say about us is never quite true; but it is never quite false, either; they always miss the bull’s eye, but they rarely fail to hit the target.”
Donald H. Rumsfeld, former US Secretary of Defense, agreed: “If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much.”
Or as Michel de Montaigne states, “We need very strong ears to hear ourselves judged frankly, and because there are few who can endure frank criticism without being stung by it, those who venture to criticize us perform a remarkable act of friendship, for to undertake to wound or offend a man for his own good is to have a healthy love for him.”
Take heed of your critics. Take the case of Samuel L. Jackson. The award-winning Hollywood actor no longer loses his cool when playing golf, thanks to one critic. “One day, I did get angry with myself and threw a club,” he recalled. “My caddie told me, ‘You’re not good enough to get mad.”
A fair lady once wrote to me if I accept comments. What she actually meant was if I can live with criticisms. “Sure, I acknowledge both good and bad comments,” I replied. “The good comments tell me that I am on the right track. The bad comments are my gauge to strive better. In other words, what I am doing is not good enough.”
The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved with criticism. O.A. Battista said, “One of the surest marks of good character is a man’s ability to accept personal criticism without malice to the one who gives it.”
What does the Bible say about being a critic? It said, “Be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath. “
Henry Ward Beecher pointed out: “We should not judge people by their peak of excellence; but by the distance they have traveled from the point where they started.”
More often than not, don’t believe what critics say about you or your ability. Bill Cartwright, who became one of the famous basketball players in the US National Basketball Association, commented: “I remember when I was in college, people told me I couldn’t play in the NBA. There’s always somebody saying you can’t do it, and those people have to be ignored.”
In arts and literature, critics are called reviewers. Samuel Taylor Coleridge explains: “Reviewers are usually people who would have been poets, historians, biographers, if they could. They have tried their talents at one thing or another and have failed; therefore, they turn critic.”
I know some people who don’t want to be criticized. On second thought, they should hear the words of Samuel Johnson: “I would rather be attacked than unnoticed. For the worst thing you can do to an author is to be silent as to his works. An assault upon a town is a bad thing; but starving it is still worse.”
Or, as some movie starlets put it: “Bad publicity is still publicity.”
Even world leaders are not spared from criticisms. American president Abraham Lincoln admits: “If I care to listen to every criticism, let alone act on them, then this shop may as well be closed for all other businesses. I have learned to do my best, and if the end result is good then I do not care for any criticism, but if the end result is not good, then even the praise of ten angels would not make the difference.”
The words of Charles Schwab also come to mind: “In my wide association in life, meeting with many and great men in various parts of the world, I have yet to find the man, however great or exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than he would ever do under a spirit of criticism.”
