“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and
creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie
***
Last April, my niece, Erika Meg, expressed her gratitude to her parents for shaping her throughout the years. In her graduation speech, she stated, “I want to convey to everyone that I am not merely a student; I am also a daughter to my parents. My existence today would be inconceivable without them, and I stand before you to express my deep appreciation for my parents.
“During my childhood, my mother was my source of joy. Conversely, my father was my source of strength. Therefore, without them, I am nothing. My parents have provided me with substantial financial support, even though I recognize that they face challenges in doing so due to unforeseen circumstances. They consistently suppress their emotions to shield me from heartache.
“They often assert that they are fine, even though they are genuinely very tired,” she continued. “To my mother, Rovilla, and my father, Avednigo, I am immensely grateful for your endless love, guidance, and support. I love you both.”
“The words ‘Thank You’ bear fruit immediately,” wrote Fr. Frank Mihalic, a priest and author of inspirational books. “When we are thanked, our first reaction is to go and thank someone else. And in that way, we start a whole chain reaction of thanks.”
Hearing those two words motivates us, right? “What is particularly inspiring is thanks from above: parents thanking children, bosses thanking employees, teachers thanking pupils,” Fr. Mihalic said. “But why is it that giving thanks is automatic to strangers and not to those near?”
Allow me to recount the story of a young boy named Howard Kelly, who was an orphan, impoverished, famished, and solitary. I came across this narrative shared on social media. While I cannot ascertain its authenticity, it certainly illustrates the essence of gratitude.
In order to sustain himself and finance his education, Howard traversed from one house to another, selling small items. One day, feeling famished and with not a single penny to his name, he resolved to knock on a door in search of food.
However, when a young woman answered, her beauty and compassion caused him to hesitate. Feeling embarrassed to request a meal, he timidly inquired, “Could I please have… a glass of water?”
The woman, perceiving his plight, returned with a generous glass of milk. He drank it slowly, relishing each sip. “How much do I owe you?” he asked. She smiled warmly. “You owe me nothing. My mother instilled in me the principle of never accepting payment for acts of kindness.”
Howard expressed his heartfelt gratitude to her. However, her generosity did not merely satisfy his hunger; it also rejuvenated his belief in humanity.
As time went by, the young woman matured and encountered a severe illness that local physicians were unable to treat. She was moved to a larger city for medical care. Among the consulting experts was Dr. Howard Kelly, who had become one of the leading doctors in the nation and a co-founder of Johns Hopkins Medical School.
Upon hearing the name of the patient’s hometown, his expression brightened. He took the initiative to visit her hospital room and instantly recognized her. Indeed, it was the same girl who had once presented him with that glass of milk. The prognosis was dire.
Nevertheless, Dr. Kelly refused to surrender. Motivated by his memories and a sense of gratitude, he committed himself to preserving her life. After several months of treatment and attention, she made a full recovery.
When the hospital forwarded her the bill, she felt a moment of uncertainty. She was aware that she could never afford the cost. However, as she opened the envelope, something at the bottom of the page caught her attention—a handwritten note beneath the words “Amount due.” It stated: “Paid in full… with one glass of milk.”
“Saying ‘Thank you’ helps not only ourselves but also the people who hear it,” wrote Fr. Mihalic. “If we thank people, they don’t forget it. And the next time around, they will be glad to be of help to us. They feel they owe us something. Thanking people cheer them up; you can see their faces light up. It makes their work lighter. They go on doing the same old job, but somehow it seems interesting and easier.”
Most people fail to say thank you because they really don’t know the real meaning of those two words. Or, they may say it but really don’t mean it. Let’s listen to the words of American author Kim Holden (of The Other Side distinction): “I’ve said thank you thousands of times in my life. Most of the time I mean it to some degree. There are times when I’ve said it and felt the gratitude behind the words wholeheartedly, but I don’t think I ever understood what those two words truly meant until this very moment.”
Practice makes perfect, so goes the saying. The same is true with telling someone the two words, “Thank You.” In his book, Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff… and It’s All Small Stuff, Richard Carlson wrote: “If you’re anything like me, you probably have many people in your life to feel grateful for: friends, family members, people from your past, teachers, gurus, people from work, someone who gave you a break, as well as countless others. You may want to thank a higher power for the gift of life itself, or for the beauty of nature.”
To thank these people, Carlson said that you have to spend a moment every day thinking of someone to thank. “As you think of people to be grateful for, remember that it can be anyone – someone who allowed you to merge into traffic, someone who held the door open for you, or a physician who saved your life. The point is to gear your attention toward gratitude, preferably first thing in the morning.”
To end this column, allow me to quote the words of William Arthur Ward, an often-quoted writer of inspiration maxims: “God gave you a gift of 84,600 seconds today. Have you used one of them to say thank you?”
