Filipinos remember the dead by visiting the cemeteries primarily and offering flowers, lighting candles and offering prayers for them especially on All Saints’ day and All Souls’ day. Those who could not visit the cemetery do these at home. Those who could afford the cost also dedicate a mass for their deceased loved ones.
In Islam, there are no such days as All Saints Day and All Souls Day. Even during these days that Christians remember their deceased loved ones, Muslims should not go to the Muslim cemeteries and offer flowers and light candles like the Christians do but prayers to Allah for the forgiveness of the dead loved one’s sins any time of the year, however, is acceptable and is considered a pious action.
Visiting the Muslims cemeteries or Maqbarah in Arabic is also a commendable act according to Prophet Muhammad when he said, “Visit the graves because it reminds you of the After-life.” Narrated by Imam Muslim.
This visit may be made to any Muslim cemetery and not necessarily the exact grave of a loved one who died. Whenever a Muslim visits a cemetery or if he passes by it, he may say, “Assalaamu ‘Alaykum ahlad diyari minal muminin wal muslimin, in sha Allah bikum lahiqun, as’alullaha lana wa lakum al ‘afiyah (peace be upon you O people of the dwellings, believers and Muslims, In sha Allah we will join you, I ask Allah to keep us and you safe and sound).” When making this supplication, the Muslim should not face the grave but he should face the direction of the Ka’bah rather.
Salatul Janazah is also a commendable act in the grave especially for those newly buried if some people are not able to pray the Salatul Janazah for this dead person before he is interred. Salatul Janazah is a voluntary prayer where Muslims invoke Allah to forgive the sins of the dead person they are praying for and for Allah to accept his good deeds too. Other than Salatul Janazah, there are no other prayers allowed in the grave like the obligatory prayers according to what Prophet Muhammad said, “All of the earth is a mosque, apart from graveyards and washrooms.” Narrated by Imam At Tirmidhi. This means that cemeteries are not meant as praying grounds and so are toilets. This clearly states that regular Islamic prayers such as the dawn, noon, afternoon and evening prayers are forbidden in the cemetery except for the Salatul Janazah where there is no bowing or prostration.
There is also a rule against praying or doing any other acts of worship that do not have any basis in the teachings of Islam. This includes any act of worship that are being done in the cemetery other than the prescribed du’a or the Salatul Janazah. Offering flowers and lighting candles for the dead in the grave is forbidden.
The Muslims should not build any structure above the grave or put lights or anything other than soil and rocks. The graves are also supposed to remain simple and no decorations are to be put on it, not even a tombstone that bears the name of the buried Muslim. This has been ordered in Islam to safeguard the equality of the Muslims in the cemeteries. We have observed that the cemeteries of the Christians, for example, who let the rich build lavish mausoleums while the poor are only buried in apartment type graves that go on top of one another where if the rent is not paid on time, the bones of the deceased risk being thrown out and being lost. The simplicity of the Muslim graves and the equality of the Muslims in their graves whether they are rich or poor is a constant reminder that upon death, there is nothing that the dead possessed while he is still alive will benefit him in the grave or the hereafter. Only his good deeds, the rewards of his charity and the prayers of his loved ones will accompany him. The only thing in the world of the living that might benefit them is their prayers for the forgiveness of his sins and the acceptance of his good deeds.
The simplicity of the graves is also meant to protect the Muslims from being extravagant in preparing their graves that shall not avail the dead any benefit.
There is also a strict prohibition in doing deeds that contain acts of worship that should only be dedicated to Allah such as praying to the dead person or asking for his help, forgiveness and intercession for the living in order for their prayers to reach Allah. These are all mere superstitions of some misguided Muslims. This in fact is so dangerous that such actions may remove them from Islam as they constitute disbelief and worship of others other than Allah.
Belief in the ghost of the dead visiting the living is also a superstitious belief that is unacceptable in Islam. Allah said in the Quran, “And before them is a barrier until the day they are raised.” Quran 23:100. This means that the spirit of the dead cannot visit the world of the living in order to make them feel their presence, send a message or even haunt people. The dead are on the other side of this barrier where they will stay until they are brought back to life with everybody else on Judgment day.
As for women visiting the graves, it is strictly forbidden. Prophet Muhammad said, “Allah cursed those who visit the graves.” Narrated by Imam At Tirmidhi. The women, however, may join in the performance of the Salatul Janazah but not in the burial or even visiting the grave after some time that the dead has been buried. This prohibition is due to the temptation they may cause when they show extreme emotions while they are in the cemetery.
Generally, if a Muslim visits a cemetery, he should observe proper courtesy to the graves that he should not be noisy, step upon it or do anything that he would not do to a living human being. The dead in Islam is respected the same way we respect those who are alive. Such is the way Muslims pay their respects to the dead.
